Aspiring Poet, heartfelt thoughts.I Have Dystonia, bipolar, and an Avid Southern Gospel Music fan

 I am willing to admit that with this disease there comes some mental issues, and things that I cannot help. As much as I try to put on a face of everything is great in my life and I have no problems at all.   No one and I mean no one understands the mental issues that I have! I have been told I mope, and I use it as a cruch not to do anything, but what is missing and what they do not understand I exist in 2 different reality's. My mind exists in one and I in the other, and sometimes I do not know which is which.   Really all anyone ever does is get upset when I do something they do not like, or maybe wrong, but for me in the moment I cannot help myself. weather it is buying a hat, or Playing a video game for Long periods of time. This is not something I enjoy, but I do not know how to stop it, and neither does my therapist!     yelling at me or saying that I am doing this on  purpose is frustrating! for a moment put yourself in my shoes, just for a sec...

I do not have much for updates, except summer is coming which means my health will take a downward turn. I cannot do much in the summer because the moment I step outside into the sun I feel like my skin is boiling, very unpleasant, as you can imagine, While others around me enjoy the summer, and the nice change of pace, I enjoy the Winter or fall, but here we have 2 seasons winter and summer no fall no spring.   It is quite interesting the take I have on the quarantine now that people have been that way for a few weeks, they are starting to get restless, and protests are breaking out all over the country, because people can't feel trapped, I might remind you that this is my everyday, there is no when it is over we will get back to normal and be able to go back out and do all of the things we love to do, because for me the truth is when this blows over nothing will change. I will still feel trapped, I still won't be able to go to most places because of the loud noises. I will b...