Love You Mom

 At the feet of Jesus

there are no years to measure—
no anniversaries,
no “one year gone.”

Only now.

I wonder what that now feels like for her.
Does she remember the ache of this world,
or has it already fallen away
like a coat she no longer needs?

Here, I count days with a tight chest.
There, she stands where love has weight,
where faith is no longer whispered
but spoken face to face.

I wonder if she knows
how often I still reach for her,
how time keeps pressing forward
while she rests outside of it.

She is not waiting.
She is not missing anything.
She is where all questions finally exhale—
at the feet of Jesus,
where eternity is gentle
and grief cannot follow.

And I remain,
learning how to live in seconds,
trusting that one day
time will loosen its grip,
and I’ll step into that same now,
and see her there.

                                                                          ~~jhf